“Memories are wonderful things, if you don’t have to deal with the past”
Something about this quote from ‘Before Sunset’ really draws me towards it. I do agree with the first part of the line, but it is slightly difficult for me to agree with the second part. Indeed, memories are beautiful things, but are they only beautiful if you don’t have to ‘deal’ with the element of the past that they carry with them?
5 years down the line after my dad left me, I still think about him. The relationship that I had with him and the realization that I no longer share that kind of relationship with him, or anyone else anymore brings tears to my eyes. But I still cherish every moment spent with him, I cherish fondly every moment that I spent with him. His memories are still beautiful, despite the fact that every time I think about him, the bitterness of the separation and betrayal strikes back.
I think it has something to do with the fact that how one has accepted the past and if one has learnt from it in a positive way. Past memories will remain beautiful if you know that the past is now PAST and if you have moved on. I have accepted that dad has gone and he is never coming back. Till the time I had a hope he might come back, the memories were unpleasant. Now they are just memories…something I will carry with me all my life.
So, taking from my experience, I think it is important to learn from one’s mistakes. Every thing that happens has a reason. Even if we dont see it now, we will see it, perhaps 10 years later. We cant prevent a close relative dying, we can’t avoid doing mistakes, trusting the wrong people sometimes, but we have to learn that there is a reason that that particular relative left our side, we have to learn that every mistake teaches us a lesson. The important thing to do here is, remember the lesson the mistake has taught you. And everytime the memory of that past event is rekindled, remind yourself that it taught you an important virtue of life and the art of living. And that is how life is…..
So, to conclude my article, I would like to revise the dialogue and say “Memories are wonderful things, WHEN you can deal with the past “.